he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize