I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
