Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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