I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
