Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
