no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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