Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
