You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
