I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Randomize
