i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize
