Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I pour the whiskey from now on
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
