My friends, they love my intelligence
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
