I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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