we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
