would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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