id be glad to
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Enjoy the penises
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
