me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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