Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
