Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
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