How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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