If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
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