great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
