he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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