i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
sex in a hospital.. check
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
