yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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