I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
