girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize