yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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