i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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