hotel room ftw
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
