We're facebook friends in real life
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
