Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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