I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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