i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
