When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize