Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
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