hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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