Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
