No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
