We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize