I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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