so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
