we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
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