There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize