i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
We're hate flirting, damnit.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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