I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
