But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Randomize
