His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
