That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
