It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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