Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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